Have you ever wondered if your heart was broken? Not broken as in someone hurt you emotionally, but you do not have the capacity to fall in love as frequent and easily as those around you. Personally, in this age of technology, I think Cupid’s arrows need a GPS. While we are at it, those arrows need a lie detector attachment among other important tests that individuals fail to consider when diving into a relationship.
This is just one of many reasons why singles such as myself should be grinning Feb. 14 . No anticipation of what the big gift will be this year – no disappointment if it’s the plastic rose and a last-minute candy grab at the local drug store. Worse, your significant other forgets! Gasp! I suggest you celebrate yourself and the love you have from friends and family.
The image of love in 2013 has certainly changed since the inception of Valentine’s Day many broken hearts ago. In the midst of online ‘imaginary’ romances versus face-to-face relationships, what can Valentine’s Day ’13 possibly mean to us single folks in the CSRA?
With social settings such as church, colleges, eateries, night spots and online dating services such as match.com, eharmony.com, zoosk.com, christianmingle.com, and more, options are everywhere for those searching for a significant other.
Quite frankly, there are days when I want my own set of arrows to intimidate that winged baby they call “Cupid” or at least swat him down midflight with one of my highest-heeled shoes. Who gave a baby the authority to shoot a love-infused bow and arrow anyway? Deciding who gets roses and chocolates on Valentine’s Day – absurd! As a lifelong bachelorette, I feel I have a certain expertise to an open, honest outlook on the state of singlehood in 2013. It is better to be alone and happy than to be partnered with the wrong person just to have someone in your life.
There is a big difference in being alone and being lonely. Relationships might be ‘‘circling the drain’’ this time of year, but that doesn’t stop the delusional from using Valentine’s Day to showcase their ‘‘perfect’’ relationship.
I shake my head at the effort but also feel a wave of relief to be immune to all the hubbub that is created on one day when, in actuality, couples should treat each other daily to the love and admiration they spew on Feb. 14. The joy of singlehood far outweighs the false sense of coupledom.
I look forward to a lovely night out with friends this Feb. 14 ; watching a newly released chick flick, a 5-star meal and most definitely an abundance of conversations on lost loves – a.k.a. God’s blessings. I am not in favor of the memory-burn parties because I truly believe if you allow someone into your life and into your heart, they must have some redeeming qualities that may have been lost along the way. I say treasure the memories and learn the lesson.
Heartaches are God’s reminder of how deep your capacity to love is. My next relationship will force me to set standards a bit more stringent than previously followed. Ladies, it is not too much to ask that a partner be honest and loyal, lift you up emotionally, and have keys. Yes, I said keys. That comes from my Moma: “Never date a man who doesn’t have keys to a home and a car!” Moma is one smart lady!
Happy Valentine’s Day – and remember, love thyself and the chocolates, flowers and cards will be the added shimmer to a real, honest relationship.
T.S. NEWMAN IS A NORTH AUGUSTA RESIDENT.